Look at the blog, Larry. Just look at that blog.

This is gonna be about Band-Aids. It's pretty great.

#49. First, we take philosophy. Then, we dip it in rich, creamery butter.

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Alright, so here’s an idea.

I’m… going… to watch……………. The Simpsons.

TV inspires me. And besides, it’s not like The Simpsons hasn’t given back to society, right? The whole idea of a prime-time cartoon aimed at adults hadn’t been seen in years, and led to countless similar cartoon wunderkinds. Plus, the golden age of The Simpsons can boast one of the funniest, sharpest, most culturally-relevant and lightning-fast senses of humor of any television show. Ever.

At least, that’s my opinion on the matter. Philosophy books have been written about The Simpsons, putting the ideas of Sartre, Plato, and other schlubs into a Springfieldian context, so that complex philosophical ideas could be easily understood by the masses, and a bunch of authors could write about The Simpsons. Because, as far as I’m concerned, everyone loves The Simpsons. Everyone.

So here’s my plan. I am going to watch one of my personal favorites- ‘Bart the Lover,’ from season three.
The episode’s B-plot is that a swear jar is introduced to the Simpson household, and Homer has to adhere to it even as he suffers hilarious injury after hilarious injury. I am going to watch this episode. I am going to notate every wound any character suffers (because suffering… equals Band-Aids). At that point… well, I don’t really know, but I suppose I’ll do something. Something great.

2:39- Rod Flanders takes a paper airplane to the eyeball.

4:17- Principal Skinner’s ear is grazed by a yo-yo. It isn’t much, but still.

4:55- Random child is smacked in the head with a yo-yo.

Kind of a slapstick-free stretch here…. don’t worry. It’ll all work out in the end.

17:26- Homer is attacked by bees.

(See, I knew something would happen that was excruciatingly painful. It’s alllll about trust).

18:11- Homer breaks his thumb with a hammer.

18:16- Homer steps on a rusty nail.

Well, there it is. A play-by-play of everything in that particular Simpsons that could possibly be related to Band-Aids. This is about the time where I’d wrap everything up with a closing paragraph that explains the deeper meaning of what I just did. Honestly, though, I don’t think there’s too much hiding beneath the surface of this particular post. I really just wanted to watch the Simpsons in this blog.

And in that sense, I accomplished everything I’ve ever dreamed of.


Written by mandudeman

May 4, 2011 at 2:32 pm

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